I Was the Dirty Carry

Since the release of Blackrock Foundry, I had declared my raiding hiatus and stopped logging in to do anything substantial but my weekly ICC and Ulduar runs in hope of a shiny mount.

Two months of missing out on collecting Elemental Runes. My guild had already progressed to doing regular (base ilvl 685 drops) BRF (I call this new "Heroic" you people call "regular", cause that's what it is").

I came back, and did LFR. And....it was....fun! Seeing Kromok do his rune thing and people actually follow mechanics in LFR jump-started the immersion ignition for me. I must raid! I decided: "you know what, I don't need to be #1 in DPS all the time to have fun. I must explore this raid zone!

Except I was frozen in time at ilvl 668 since February. I did log in and attempt my garrison gear missions, but that was it. I joined my warlock's old guild's (the one I've always been in if you're an avid reader) flex BRF, and her current guild was willing to accept me with open arms the next week into normal (heroic).

Everyone else was in their 680s approaching 690, I'd have to be the dirty carry. I went from 668 to 675 in one night. It was a good start.

Let's see if I can remember what I saw:

Gruul: Sidestep, move away on that other thing. Boring.

Guy With Animals: Kill spear, don't stand in spear, kill things. Boring.

Rolly Ore Halls: Move when he throws up, then don't get ran over. Decent.

Arnold Schwarzenneger Converyor Belt Steam Presses: Use your portal, and stop casting to live. Fun.

Train Tracks: Don't get hit and kill the cannons and stay on the periphery. Annoying. (Why can't we fight him at the spot right before his spawn point?)

Fire Lady Stack Kill Wolves: Exactly what my description of her is. Fun.

Did this re-ignite WoD? No. I logged off IMMEDIATELY after raid so I did not have to deal with the drudgery that is the rest of the expansion. There was nothing I won that needed enchanting or reforging, nor was there any other substantial "path of progression" to compliment all the shiny loot I won. It was raid or GTFO. So I GTFO'd...

Actually everything I said above was a lie.

See, a couple weeks ago I did Naxx 25. And inside the 4-Horseman's chest I received [Damnation]! My druid had been using this staff for months, and I guess my warlock had been slowly resenting the game out of envy.

I swapped my transmog to the Sha Skin set, slapped on this staff and thought "AMAZING. I MUST SHARE THIS!".

Truny the Liar